International Order of Columbiform Passerines

Sciurine operative rebuffed by border sentry.

COLUMBIFORM PASSERINES, In­ter­na­tion­al Order of. Pi­geons, as they are more com­mon­ly known, are the largest and most mil­i­tant avian di­nosaur syn­di­cate, re­spon­si­ble for pa­trolling the world’s cities and oth­er ar­eas of hu­man con­cen­tra­tion.  As such, they have fi­nal au­thor­i­ty in mat­ters re­gard­ing the man­age­ment of hu­man pop­u­la­tions.  With the du­al mis­sion of surveil­lance and food ex­trac­tion, they serve as the first line of de­tec­tion of po­ten­tial­ly dan­ger­ous lev­els of hu­man ad­vance­ment (or, as is now thought slight­ly more prob­a­ble, col­lapse).

Pi­geons are ex­treme­ly ef­fi­cient and ruth­less dic­ta­tors.  It is on­ly their on­go­ing ter­ri­to­ri­al feud with the squir­rels which has thus far spared hu­man­i­ty the full fo­cus of their wrath.